wow so… i definitely haven’t written anything here in a really really long time. here’s a quick update on everything.

1. I’m going to VCU in a week for a summer program that i probably shouldnt be taking because im going there in the fall, but… im excited anyways

2. My boyfriend and I are still going strong. 7 months tomorrow!!! I love him so much

3. I graduated from high school. yay me! haha.

4. I had a sweet graduation party with my best friend.

5. I started a new job as a waitress. It kinda sucks because customers are so rude and demanding but i’m making a decent amount of money.

6. My best friend and I are renting an apartment for college next year. woohoo

7. I’m learning to cherish sleep and every single day off that i have

8. I really want to go to the beach.

wow i am finding it incredibly easy to ignore my bitchy roommate

Alright so….. i took that trip home and i feel a little better. my time at home was great. my boyfriend is so supportive and i i love him so much. it was also really nice to see friends and family, people who i know actually care about me. it was great to be around people that aren’t judging you all the time, starting drama, or running around the halls screaming like idiots. Also, since my roommate and i got in a huge fight and basically told eachother we hate eachother, i’ve decided just not to talk to her until she talks to me to avoid conflict. you may say thats adding more conflict, but… i would just rather not talk to her.

 On another note… some girl at our rival high school killed herself last saturday because she was being teased. she was actually really talented in singing and was definitely on her way to becoming famous. its so sad when you hear stuff like that. even though i didnt know her i felt really sad about the whole thing. it really makes you think.  god bless you.

wow… so…

i’m pretty sure i just kind of lost my mind. I was talking to monty and all of a sudden i got really sad and all the bad things that have been happening over the past month or two piled up on me and i started crying. all i could think about was going home and for some reason i HAD to go home right then. so after i got off the phone with monty i called my house and no one answered naturally because it was 1:30 in the morning. then i called my dad and luckily he was just getting off work. so we talk for a while and he decides i can come home for the weekend. honestly though… i cant say im happy. im leaving in 3 hours to go to the train station, but i just cant get rid of this feeling of failure. im going to have to miss three days of work in order to do this and im pretty sure im going to lose my oh so wonderful job. im saying its for a family emergency but the thing is…its more of an emily losing her mind emergency. i have no idea whats wrong with me and i hope i can change it while im home. im honestly not too worried about losing my job though. its costing me more money than its worth and i think its adding to my stress. i really wish things were different and i didnt have to call them up in a few hours though. i know theyre going to be really pissed off and im not looking forward to the conversation at all. i feel like i just need to be with my family though. my boyfriend and a few friends would really help too. i have no idea why im feeling the way i am lately. maybe i can figure it out while im home. i dont know

This site is getting an Extreme Makeover for the summer. It’s getting a new layout and I’m going to try to actually write everyday. Actually… now that I think about it… I kind of want an extreme makeover too. Prom is coming up and I have two to go to this year. I already got a gorgeous dress so now i just need a gorgeous body to go with it haha. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not like anorexic or anything, I just want to tone up and lose a couple pounds before I go. I really can’t wait though. I have a whole list of exciting things that are happening…

1. April 21st… last day of work?
2. April 23rd…I GO HOME!!! (for a little)
3. April 24th…Getting my hair done
4. April 25th…Meeting Monty’s dad (i’m nervous!)
5. April 26th… Monty’s Prom
6. May 7th?…Going home again (for a little)
7. May 10th… My prom
8. May 15th…Last day of school!!!
9. May 16th…Going home for good!!!!
10. June 4th…Nags Head???

I really can’t wait until the last day of school. I’m not really happy here anymore and I can’t wait to go home.

I WANT MY SAT SCORES!!!! but i cant get them til 8 am this morning. it’s killing me!!!!! haha

I am super super scared.

O.O

Update: I got an 1830 on my SAT! Yay!!!

is it bad that i secretly kind of wish that people that sleep around with tons of guys would get pregnant?

i definitely think thats wrong of me  to wish that on them haha but…. its kinda how i feel. I guess i just hate whores? it seems like people that just sleep with people they’re in serious commited relationships with always get pregnant and the whores never do. i really kinda wish it was the other way around haha.

so wow… i haven’t written in a really really long time. i’m going to try to get back into the habit though. i really do like writing on here. it relieves some of the stress that i have. so let’s see… what’s been going on lately?

1. I got into a summer intensive program at VCU. It’s for 3 weeks this summer and we’re going to be doing merchandising in the morning and design in the afternoon. sounds like lots of fun but… the city it’s in is dangerous so… i’m scared haha.
2. I am currently in the best relationship of my life and couldnt ask for anything better. I think i finally found the guy for me.
3. The sad part is i can’t see him or anyone else from Virginia for another two months.
4. I’ve been really upset lately. I guess i’m just kind of depressed about not being able to go home for so long. Also, it seems like everyone here is pretty much out to get me. I find myself doubting people who i actually thought were friends and trying my best to spend as little time with them as possible. kind of sad, but i really honestly couldnt care less right now. why should i make an effort if theyre just going to be bitches and assholes. so i’ve been throwing myself into work and school. awesome…
5. I just sent my application off to VCU today for next fall. hopefully they’re going to accept me! I need to get out of Charlotte BADLY
6. I want to lose weight really really really bad. the thing is… i hate exercise and love carbs. haha. oh well, i guess i’ll just have to suffer
7. I WANT MY HOUSE BACK. I really need my own room. this is kind of killing me.
8. I’ve also been thinking about dying my hair. im not sure what color though… something light. i cant have anything dark in the summer
9. i think im going to start writing down everything i eat
10. …36 more days til i go home?

Things seem like theyre changing so quickly.

One minute it seems like my life is exactly the way i want it, and the next minute it does a complete turn around. It all started with this stupid career project we had to do for fashion. For this project we had to research what our entry level pay for a specific job in the fashion industry was. I picked assistant fashion editor because im pretty sure that one day i want to be a fashion editor or editor-in-chief of a magazine. I found out how little money i would be making and put together a monthly budget for living in San Francisco. As you can guess, the outcome wasnt that great.

After doing that project i’ve come to realize some things. No matter how comfortable and perfect my life seems right now, it won’t be for long. After i graduate i have to start paying off my student loans and move to a big city in hopes to get a job.

So… here’s what’s going to happen. I’m going to transfer schools. Yes, Johnson & Wales is a respectable school and has a great post-graduation employment rate, BUT it is known mostly as a cooking school. You might say that the business students get good jobs too, but what about the fashion students? JWU is not known for its fashion program at all. In fact, the campus i go to doesnt even have its fashion program completely set up yet. The school that i’m hopefully transferring to is VCU, where the program seems to be much more thorough and the alumni is more impressive. I think i’m going to keep my major as fashion merchandising but make my minor in writing.

So anyways… hopefully that is whats going to happen. Things right now are far from perfect though. It’s a hard decision to make. I have lots of cool friends here and i really like Charlotte, even though it gets awfully boring sometimes. People are actually getting mad at me for transferring. It’s really weird. I mean yeah i would really like to stay here but this is my life we’re talking about and the sooner i’ve got it on track, the better. I was planning on being here next year, but i just feel like i’m wasting so much time i could be using to learn valuable skills that i’ll need in the future.

This was a pretty long blog post. Thanks if you read it. It probably bored you to tears haha. If you didnt thats fine too. Any advice anyone?

I got bored and i decided that i’m going to post an update on my life for those of you who care haha.

School: Ehhhhh, school’s been okay i guess. It seems like everything is going okay but i feel like i’m beginning to fall behind. I guess i have no choice but to catch up though because i missed most of my days that i’m allowed to miss. Private colleges kind of suck. I really wish i was at one of those schools that let you wear jeans and a hoodie to class and let you skip whenever you wanted. That would be really cool. I could just get the assignments in advance, do them by myself, and then just show up whenever i wanted. That would be amazing.

Friends: Things on the friend front are looking good. We’ve been having so much fun despite having like…. nothing to do haha. Last night was sooo fun. We stayed up til like 5 in the morning just wandering around the halls in the dorm and acting like idiots haha. I kind of like doing that because you get to see a lot of people you dont normally see. Some friends have decided to go crazy though. They’re sooooo dramatic and kind of starting to really bother me. I really miss my friends in Williamsburg, but i’m going home to see them in 3 days!!!! yay!!!!

Job: So… I’m pretty sure i got this job at Express, which would be amazing. I would love to work there because i love their clothes and i heard that they get discounts like everywhere. Everything seems good so far. David just has to check my references and will hopefully call and offer me a job soon. If that doesnt work out, I have an interview with Victoria’s Secret on Wednesday. That would be a cool place to work too…. but i think i would prefer Express.

Love: Ohhhh my God. I don’t even know where to begin. My boyfriend is THE most amazing and caring person i have ever met in my life. We’ve been together for about a month and a half and i can tell that this is going to last a very long time. He’s absolutely perfect. He’s always doing cute stuff like giving me little kisses all the time and buying me flowers and we never run out of things to talk about. I can’t wait to see him. 3 more days <3<3<3